Why Can't We Say, “This is Love”?

 

Whenever love is discussed, older generations often look back fondly on their ways of romance, claiming it was pure and meaningful. They question today’s relationships by labeling them as fast, shallow or less genuine. But can anyone truly define what love is and what it is not? Love is fluid, shaped by time, technology, and individual choices. It can never fit into a single definition.  

The older way of loving was built on patience. It was about eye contacts, writing heartfelt letters, and waiting for the right moments. Intimacy took time, and the emotional connection grew naturally. Communication was limited to letters, messengers, or rare meetings. Each interaction felt significant because it was not easily accessible. Media played a major role too, with radio shows and television shaping their understanding of love. This approach was beautiful but it was specific to their time and not an universal truth about love.

In today’s world love moves at a different pace. Communication is instant with texts and video calls replacing letters. Couples meet more often, go on dates, and often express physical affection earlier in the relationship. Media today bombards us with countless perspectives on love, from movies to social media posts. People are not rushing, they are adapting to a faster world with different norms. Just because it is different does not mean it is any less real or meaningful.  

Both approaches are shaped by the resources and lifestyles of their times. Older generations did not have the advantage of instant communication or the exposure that media now provides. Their love felt distant and patient because it had to be. Today people are more informed, and relationships embody the convenience of modern life. Neither way is inherently better or worse, they are just products of their time.  

This constant comparison between the past and present only leads to misunderstanding. Love has never been about a single method or timeline. It is personal and unique, varying from person to person. Whether it is slow and steady or fast and passionate, love finds its own way. People should be free to choose how they express and experience it without being judged.  

So instead of holding on to the idea that one way of loving is superior, maybe it is time to accept that love in all its forms is valid. Let go of the need to define what is pure and let people find their own version of love. After all, isn’t that what love is all about?